A feeling of great sadness has washed over me this week. My boy, my last baby, started school nursery. He spends 5 mornings at nursery and five afternoons with the OAP Childminders.
On the first day he brings home an amazing toilet roll/Malteser box/wool sculpture and I display it proudly … “It’s a nest” he says.
“What did you do today?” I ask him at tea time. “Nuffink” is the reply. As I explain that there is a ‘th’ and a ‘g’ in ‘nothing I notice his sister looks smug, happy that someone else is getting a grilling for a change.
He says, “I don’t like school”.
The 5 year old, with all her wisdom, tells him “You’ll have to get used to it, you have ‘miles and miles’ to go”.
A Mister Maker special
On the second day, when I take him to nursery, I stay for a few minutes to settle him in. In a plastic apron he lays everything out in the ‘art workshop’ ready to use … a bit like Mister Maker.
When he is settled and happily gluing I tell him I’m going, giving him a kiss and a hug. As I turn to go I hear a little voice say “Mummy”. I turn to see my big tall boy looking lost and slightly panicky, looking up at me with big pleading eyes. He says “Don’t go”, so I stay a bit longer.
Later, as I leave, I gaze through the window at my big tall boy wielding a spatula in his blue plastic apron. I think about giving up work, somehow spending more time with him.
I could home school.
I could teach my children how to sit on the sofa, how to blog, how to get lost on the way to IKEA, how to complete Mushroom Gorge on Mario Kart, how to bake and burn chocolate peanut butter brownies. I could show them how to buy and sell on ebay, match up socks, load the dishwasher and read Red magazine cover to cover.
No, I could not home school.
I have to let go, but it hurts.
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Dawn/LittleGreenFingers on September 16, 2009
You could so home school. You’ve just listed some of the most vital skills in life – particularly sock-matching.
Have just left my four-year-old crying his eyes out on his second day of school and I felt much the same.
Josie @Sleep is for the Weak on September 16, 2009
What are you talking about??! Your home school sounds AWESOME!!! Can I sign Kai up?
He’ll be fine… and you know it. It just sucks ass.
x
Daddy on September 16, 2009
Let go, let go those apron strings.
Matching up socks? In our house?
Ju on September 16, 2009
That hurst so much. Bless him and you.
My older one just started reception and I thought everything was going fine until she told me that a big boy hit her in the eye (right one is red now) and stamped over her art project. Oh that really upset me more than her…
http://maialarasaid.blogspot.com/
audreyhorneforever on September 16, 2009
Wife, beautiful post – you’ve made me cry once more. I am really feeling the lack of a second child lately. My baby is getting soooo big.
The 3 year old will be fine – and so will you. xxxx
Insomniac Mummy on September 16, 2009
You almost made me cry. ((Hugs))
He’ll be fine!
I’m with Josie, your home school sounds fab, well maybe for the big people LOL!
x
whistlejacket on September 16, 2009
It’s hard letting go, I find it tough now my 3 year old does 2.5 days a week at pre-school and the problem is he loves it and I wanted him to be ever so slightly upset he was leaving me at home! However they react, it’s difficult. I’m at home with mine the rest of the time and often think it’s not interesting enough for them and that I need to be ‘activities mum’ (I’m too tired though). However we do it, it’s not right…
Mwa on September 16, 2009
Home school? You’re not even allowed to think about that. (The horror!) He’ll be fine.
Home school indeed. *walks off muttering*
English Mum on September 16, 2009
I want to come to your home school… although I can already get lost, burn brownies and read Red. I need Advanced Cleaning and Not Dusting the TV with your Sock lessons, if you have a few hours to spare…
Seriously, chin up. It gets easier. Another ten years and you’ll be hurling him out of the car at 8.45. Honest.
laura WOB on September 16, 2009
Ahh he sounds lovely. I think your home schooling idea is inspired and definitely full of all lifes essential skills!
Littlemummy on September 16, 2009
Just when you’re starting to get used to answering ridiculous questions, preparing exquisite gourmet ‘picnic plates’, starting to enjoy cbeebies and even joining in with the odd jingle, we’re thrust into the next stage, and we need to adjust. It’s shit, they leave us just as they’re getting to be decent company. Never mind though, eh, you could always have another
Littlemummy on September 16, 2009
Oh, and the only reason EM is hurling hers out the door is so she can hog Toy Story Mania
Merrily on September 17, 2009
I could teach mine to cuss like sailors!
Metropolitan Mum on September 17, 2009
Nuffink.
I love it.
Little L is five months already. If time continues to fly that fast, I am going to sign her in to Laura’s home school tomorrow.
whistlejacket on September 17, 2009
PS award for you at mine!
Memories Dad on September 18, 2009
We’ve been through exactly the same over the past week or so. Last little one starting school. She was soooo ready for it but just yesterday decided she doesn’t want to go anymore… oh dear…
Dulwich Divorcee on September 18, 2009
Excellent! I’ll just send you my stroppy teenagers to home school as well. Mind you, they are quite good at baking, they could be in charge of snacks.